Most people will experience grief at some point in their life after losing someone or something close to them. It’s perfectly normal to experience emotions that can feel overwhelming or frightening, as well as physical symptoms from your grief.
For most people, these symptoms improve over time, even if they feel like they won’t. There are also things that you can try to help you cope with grief and support available to help you cope with stress, anxiety or depression you may feel after your loss.
After a bereavement or loss, the grief you experience can have a wide range of symptoms. There is no wrong way to feel and no time at which you should be experiencing certain emotions; everybody grieves in their own way.
Common symptoms include:
Although everyone experiences grief, there is no feeling when you experience loss. It’s important to understand that everyone is different and copes with loss in their own way.
Still, there are steps you can take to help you move forward while accepting the difficulty and pain of your grief. One way to do this is to try to practise what is known as the three Cs of grief: Choose, Connect, and Communicate.
It’s essential to remember that you always have the final say on what happens to you; it’s always your right to choose how you deal with your grief.
After a bereavement or loss, you can often feel as though you have very little control. There is so much you feel like you have to do, yet you may feel like you’re in a daze and unable to think clearly. Remember that it’s okay to accept help from friends or family and accept the advice of people with your best interests at heart, but ultimately, you always have to choose.
After a bereavement or loss, you may feel very lonely and isolated. It is also natural to feel overwhelmed by sadness and like you aren’t ready to speak to people about your feelings.
However, it’s important not to cut yourself off from other people and isolate yourself. Try to let the people who care about you in. Even just having another person present can be a huge comfort and help you begin to cope with your grief, knowing that you aren’t alone.
Many people feel as though they need to be strong after a loss or bereavement, often for the sake of other people around them. However, you should remember that your needs are important, too, and your emotions are valid, no matter your feelings.
Be honest with those around you, and communicate your feelings to others. Not only can this help you with your healing process, but it can also help your loved ones to know that they aren’t alone in their grief. This isn’t always easy, and showing vulnerability can be challenging, but being open with others can help you heal.
Finally, try to remember that you will need time to grieve, and it’s okay to not be okay. Take each day as it comes, and do the small things to look after yourself. Sometimes, just getting up, washing, and cooking a meal for yourself can feel like a great effort – that’s okay; just do what you can to get through your grief.
If you’re struggling with grief, stress, anxiety or depression, please speak to your GP. They can help you get treatments such as talking therapies or connect you with people who can help you cope. If you aren’t yet registered with a GP, you can do so here.
There are also organisations out there who can give you support and help you with your grief, including:
Cruse bereavement support0808 808 1677
Mind, mental health0300 123 3393
Sands, the stillbirth and neonatal death charity0808 164 3332
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